view member journals

"Boys arnt worth crying over,and the 1 that is won't make you cry."

信仰讨论, 我觉得挺有意思. 知天命之年，大家有兴趣可以聊一聊自己的经历和趣闻。

在英国时我也跟朋友们去教堂宗教体验, 每每跟着大家站着唱圣歌时, 总感到浑身不得劲. 周六总有一个香港小伙来找我参加他的圈子，我去过一两次，之后要写论文，忙得要命，只有向他直言，他讲的道理我都懂，让他不用再来找我了。

在香港工作时我要好得同事是虔诚的信徒, 我们常谈人生, 但很少正经的探讨耶稣基督，她很尊重我，我也很尊重她。

在新加坡我们的邻居朋友是教堂的活跃分子. 她常用 God Bless You! 做邮件的结尾。

我的香港朋友到家里来, 吃晚饭前我们都尊重他们的习惯跟他们一起祈祷。

这么多年来，走了很多国家，对于宗教的了解很粗浅也很表面，没有了解就谈不上真正意义上的尊重, 至于信与不信, 信到何种程度, 仁者见仁, 跟据每个人的情况而定。我们每个人的人生轨迹不同，信仰也就不可能完全一样。

我在约克大教堂里跟两个神学人员照过一张照片，照片洗出来之后，我发现，我的眼神跟他们的有很大的不同，我的眼神充满探奇的欲望和快乐，他们的眼神反射出他们内心的平静。

我儿子在新加坡学钢琴，这7 岁的小子在一个小时的时段里，花十五分钟跟钢琴老师探讨宗教。钢琴学的不咋地，离开新加坡时老师送他一本圣经。我给他充分的信仰自由，他至今还告诉我，他是free thinker，没信上帝有很多原因，其中原因之一是我得校友杨立伟 （中大得名誉博士）上太空都没见到上帝.

We were close and freindly,

Untill you let go,

Became a real meanie,

face it everyone knows,

Words so hurtful,

And text messages too,

You dont realise,

Your a backstabber too,

Names and things i didnt mean,

You took it seriosly it seems,

and i hope you realise,

you dont have to tell all those lies,

so yep, my freind completely turned, she became a complete bishop (another word for b i t c h) she keeps calling me a backstabber, has she heard of people being nice?�� anyway she used to be a complete loner, and had no freinds, then i though one day, she seems nice, i should invite her to be my friend, then we became best buds for ages, then she didnt let me talk to anyone else, if i stopped to talk to one of my freinds, she would drag me away, then she had loads of freinds because i gave them all to her, if i didnt do that she would have been a totall loner still wih her totall idiot freinds who looks like a tranny, and she called me a BISHOP?! i didnt do anything to her, i didnt even talk to her! she just doesnt like me because i actually look like a girl! lol anyway now she has turned into a complete bishop because of her tranny frinds, she also keeps prank calling me, putting on an acent then saying hello thiss is the pizza dude, you ordered a large pepperoni pizza. and its so annoying please help me and tell me what i can do to her....

�

LolaStar18

Every night they visit you

Every night they come

and bit by bit they steal your brain

and feed it to their MUM

Okay so my other most recent entry (befor the wedgie one!) explains how annoying and how much i hate my step sister, shes such an idiot, and she talks like a two year old shes like fourteen HELLO?! learn, anyway i said i should go out loads without her coming, i will say my freinds are boring lol theyre not though theyre all awesome, exept for a few.... anyway, maybe i should watch starwars to bore her to death lmao,then when she goes i will put on a film she loves called clueless, and i love it too, but starwars isnt that boring to me, but it probably is to her, shes one of those people that when they dont find things to accomodate them, theyre always bored, no matter what. anyway, im not letting her get in the way of my totall pamper day, its a day in everymonth (usually on the 6th dunno why!) and i relax and have a face mask and a bath and put my feet up and watch a film and try not to lift a finger, and i dont let people do things for me!!!

my bro gave me a wedgie lol

I can't even count how often I used to say that I was negligent. Leaving a couple of days, weeks between posts. Well, now I've left more than 8 months go by. I wonder if anyone's noticed. Probably not.�I'm unnoticable, and that's how�I like it. Because all the ones who no one notices rule the world.

So, what has happened, you ask. A lot has happened.�Charlotte got her first boyfriend. Charlotte broke up with her first boyfriend�(if you know anything about Charlotte [which I'm not sure you do] you will know that is a traumatic event). Charlotte seems to be on the brink of suicide.�Charlotte is scaring me and there is absolutely nothing I can do but stand by her and make her meet with the school counsellor.

In non-Charlotte news, my grandmother may be dying. It's strange--then, what in my life isn't? What is strange is that I don't particularly like my grandmother.�I'm sure that when she dies, I will cry and be sad.�But knowing that my dad is the way he is because of her, and knowing her thoughts and feelings a propos de some things I consider very important, there is a dislike that has built in me (aided and abetted by her long absence in my life) that is persistent and unyielding. Like I said, it's strange.

One thing I feel that I should have done a long time ago is talk about my school friends.�I'm sure I've mentioned them, but I've never really given bios of them, which would be extremely useful in understanding some of my anecdotes about them.

Shall we begin with Charlotte? Okay:

Name:�Charlotte.�Age: Same as me. Life story:�Led a very, VERY sheltered life before coming to the school where we met.�Heavily Protestant at first, but has loosened up since.�Prefers books to people, has an uncharted�obsessive personality�and�a ridiculous tendency to stress about EVERYTHING. I am almost sure that there is a name for people like that, and I'm sure she has whatever disease it is. When�I say everything, I truly mean everything. Then she stresses about the imaginary things that spring from her imagining all the terrible outcomes of her stresses. Yes, complicated. She fell madly in love/lust with a boy.�They went out for five months (practically married) and then he broke up with her. She still pines for him.�He still hesitates before he hangs up the phone, almost as if he started to say "I love you." There's a seemingly complicated life for you. Char is almost impossible to define. She is nonetheless one of my dearest friends.

Next, Malaea:

Name:�Malaea.�Age:�Same as me. Life story: Comes from a very rich family, came from a rich school, plays the clarinet and has a house in Hawaii (which she complains about often). Doesn't seem to understand how blessed she is.�People who don't know her think she's shy and quiet. Is essentially nice, but favourite pastimes include complaining about her life, talking about her life, complaining about her life some more, and telling people to shut up when THEY complain about their lives. I swear, she's actually a nice girl.�It helps that she is tiny and petite and innocent- and sweet-looking. No one suspects the cute one.

Next, Emanuelle:

Name:�Emanuelle.�Age:�Same as me. Life story: Father is an important member of the UN, and therefore travelled around a lot as a child.�Lived most of her life in Africa.�Likes boys (lots of them at once, and not for sex or anything) and shopping and pink. Is constantly pinching our cheeks and telling us how cute and chubby (I still don't get it) we are. Wants to have lots of children.�Will proudly state that she is three years old whenever we ask her how old she is after she does something stupid. Compassionate, but can hardly ever be serious.

Next, Eric:

Name:�Eric. Age: Same birthday as me, so my age. Life story:�Eric is actually a girl.�It's my nickname for her after we read Lord of the Flies in English class, because we have the same birthday and are good friends. She grew up in a very different environment from the rest of us--much less complete and/or in any way normal and/or very loving. Her family treats each other kind of like good friends who they don't like overmuch. Either way, Eric loves shopping, partying, flirting with lots of guys, and telling people she's a dominatrix (now do you see why I have to give you backstory?). She has a twisted sense of humour and revels in any prude's discomfort. Has a great heart, but a seriously crazy mind.

Next, Mara:

Name:�Mara-Sabrina. Age:�Same as me. Life story:�Mara is the one whose life story I'm not going to tell, because then we'd be stuck her for a far, far way into the future. She comes from a family who lives on various parts of the globe, and who all dislike each other in general.�Mara is... well.�Some of her family is well-off.�They don't share the wealth. We call her a hippie. Albeit a hippie with a really bad attitude.�She gets angry easily, but is all organic and earth-friendly and peace-love-grooviness (except for when she doesn't like you). You don't want to get on her bad side.�Has strong opinions about world issues that are rarely the norm.�But hey! That's what we like about her.

Lastly, Gia:

Name:�Gia. Age:�Same as me. Life story:�I saved Gia for last. Because, out of all my friends, I like Gia the least.�In fact,�I don't like her at all.�Call me cruel, go ahead.�I am not the most amiable of people, as everyone who knows me will attest to. But if there's one thing in my life that I abhor more than anything, it is followers. I understand young children idolising their siblings or parents. I understand some people needing guidance from others. I do NOT understand people who pretend to have done things, lie straight to other's faces to try to fit in. Copy what they say, what they do, what they think.�I cannot stand it.�I'm really sorry if you've done that, but really, there is nothing more offensive for me than to be aped by someone I don't even like.�Gia comes from a large Italian�family. She is of less than average intelligence.�Wants to be a vet but doesn't have the grades. Has told us she's bisexual, without showing any preference for women at all--well, except for me. But I'm getting to that. Anyways, what absolutely KILLS me about Gia is that she has no personality.�She does whatever her mother does, or what the stereotype for Italian women is (therefore, to cook and clean and feed everyone and be motherly) or whatever Char and I do. It drives me to absolute distraction.�I'd say she has a good heart, but that could be what her mother told her to be.�She could be vengeful and nasty and we'd never know.�She makes bad jokes ALL the time--bad jokes, the ones that aren't funny.

Here's the part that really disturbs me:�She is always. Staring.�At. Me. All the time.�Without fail.�I really, really don't like it.�It disturbs me.�It has happened since we met, and I have no idea why she does it.�Once I asked, and she said (while staring) "I wasn't staring,�I�swear!" I am almost 100% sure she likes me likes me.�And that makes me really uncomfortable, because I'm not bi or lesbian.�I'm not homophobic at all�(I have a couple of bi or gay friends) but to have that attention directed towards me is unnerving, to understate it.�If it were only staring that she did, I could deal with it.�But being constantly emulated and stared at and generally fawned on by this girl has worn me down to my last shred of sanity. I have NO.�IDEA. what to do.

And, chances are no one's read this far. Oh well. It was mainly to get it off my chest. Now it is out there: I do NOT.�LIKE.�GIA.�

There.�I said it.

That is going to be all for today.�I will try to start posting on a semi-regular basis.

Song recommendation: The Chain, by Fleetwood Mac.�Love that song. Can play some of it on guitar.

Goodbye for now,

~AB